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In the school of marriage your choice is your life. Your partner in marriage determines your place in destiny, because your partner is like your magnet drawing you to God or drawing you to hell. A lot of colorful destinies have been terminated as a result of wrong partners.
Samson, that great and highly anointed man of God fell as a result of a wrong partner. His destiny was short circuited; he was mocked and put to shame as a result of his wrong choice. Abigail, a woman of good understanding married a foolish and wicked husband (1Sam25v3)The resultant family was almost destroyed because of the conduct of the husband.

Beloved, beware. Take heed, that you may not enter into the trap of the devil and marry the wrong person. Here are some reasons why people marry wrongly:

1       WRONG FOUNDATION:
Building engineers made us to understand that, it is the strength of the foundation that will determine how strong a house will be. If the foundation is faulty the house can’t stand.      If the foundation is destroyed what can the righteous do?

Friends, Jesus Christ is the solid foundation for an enduring marriage. In your search for whom to marry, let Jesus have his place. Let his word and standard influence   your decision.

2          ATTEMPTING TO CHANGE ANOTHER PERSON:
If you are a child of God, a believer in Christ you need to go for people of like minds in the same  faith! Don’t think you can change anybody after marriage. Only God has power to change people.  The scripture says Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers, for what fellowship hath righteousness and what communion has light with darkness?. God’s word is superior to your emotion or knowledge, you can’t be wiser than the only wise God.

3        SUCCUMBING TO PARENTAL PRESSURE:
You must understand that your parent do not power to choose for you. No one should be allowed to use your destiny to settle friendship.
When Rebecca was to go and marry Isaac, her parent called her to seek her consent. Gen sis 24:58 says “and they called Rebecca and said unto her, will thou go with this man? And she said I will go”.

The parent of Rebecca didn’t force her.Don’t allow anyone to force you. The word of God says in Proverb 18:22 “whosoever finds a wife, found a good thing and obtain favor from the Lord”. It is the duty of every man to find his own wife.

4           TRIBAL PREJUDICE:
As a believer, we all belong to the same family, the same tribe. Once you are in Christ, there is no difference between the Jews and the Greek. Don’t rule out any tribe when it comes to marriage, the most important thing is that your partner should be washed in the blood of Jesus.

5          HASTY DECISION:

Marriage is an institution where many are rushing into while many want to rush out. You must therefore  look before you leap. To hook on to someone just because you want to get married as soon as possible, can be very dangerous. “He that hasteth with his feet sinneth”.

Why must you take foolish decision like that of Samson who saw Delilah and married her.(Judges16:4) He didn’t bother to know much about Delilah, what a hasty decision! Let God go before you and guide you, and in the name of Jesus, it shall be well.

6          AGE:
Marrying any one just because age is not longer on your side is very wrong. You’ve got to understand that for every Eve God has made, there is an Adam, and for every Adam, God has created an Eve..

If you are a lady, understand that God is not wicked. Definitely, your own Adam will come, and if you are a brother, you must know that God loves you and surely your Eve will come. Don’t force yourself on any man. Adam was relaxing when Eve was brought to him, therefore relax.

7          TOO MUCH CLOSENESS:
When you are too close to a brother or a sister, your emotions may deceive you to think you are meant for each other, and bring you into a relationship you are not set for.

Amos3:3 said “can two walk together except they be agreed”? Even if the two of you are not in agreement before, by the time you become too close , what you don’t expect may happen.

8                    PHYSICAL BEAUTY:

Beauty is deceptive. What sustains marriage is beyond sight. To go into marriage because of physical beauty is to destroy your future home. If you marry anybody because of his or her appearance alone and something happen to that good shape, what will you do?. Allow God to lead you. Don’t lead yourself into any unwholesome relationship because of physical beauty. Remember that good shape will soon go, that fine face of today may become wrinkled tomorrow. If that beauty is your only reason for marriage, you are in trouble.

9          MATERIALISM:

“And he said unto them; beware of covetousness for a man’s life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth.    Luke12:15.
If you do not want to end your life in shame you must not marry anybody because of his property or possession.

You want to marry an unbeliever because of his posh car, believing that after marriage you will change him?. Don’t make that mistake please, it is very dangerous.

10        PROPHETIC TRAP:

Marrying because of the utterance of a prophet is dangerous. You have your life, live it well. If you are a genuine child of God you have the Spirit of God who can give you a green or a red light.

Beware of the prophet whose own family is in disarray! Okay, how can someone with five wives  prophesy you into a good home?

11        PEER PRESSURE

The fact that your mates, friends and colleagues have gone ahead of you in marriage does not mean that you should jump into marriage. Every man has his own destiny. Don’t be a fool! Just because all your mates are getting married does not mean you should force yourself on just anybody.

12        LONELINESS:
Marriage does not completely deliver one from loneliness. So, to go into marriage as a cure to loneliness is completely wrong. I’ve heard people say they are going to marry so that they can be free from loneliness.

If this is the only reason why you want to marry, you may fail. Loneliness is a matter of the mind. You can be amidst ten people and still feel lonely.

13        SOCIAL PRESSURE:
When you are too concerned about the word of men and not the word of God, you may ruin your own life. Look, the world around you may see your singleness as a defeat, but how you see yourself is what matters most. To allow people’s opinion to force you into any relationship that is not of God to ruin your life, because marriage is  life.

14        REPEATED DISAPPOINTMENTS:
If you rush into marriage because you have been disappointed for up to three or four times you may rush out again. According to Proverb 24:16 “for a just man falleth seven time, and riseth up again..”

The fact that you were disappointed twice last year does not mean you should marry just anybody as fast as you can!

15        SPIRITUAL WEAKNESS:
When you are weak spiritually you are opening the doors of your life to the devil and his agents who may come in and deceive you into a wrong relationship.

I have seen situations where people were charmed into marriage. Look you need spiritual strength so as to prevent any devil from hypnotizing you into any  marital bond you are not interested in.


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Bishop(Dr) Sola Adetunji is the founding President of Chapel Of His Power and Divine Power Bible College. He was born in Ibadan, Nigeria and attended primary and secondary school in Osogbo before studying Pharmacy at the University of Ile-Ife, graduating with a Second Class Upper degree in 1987. Adetunji is an amazon author of several works and is happily married to Toyin, an ordained Minister of God, with whom he has three daughters and one son: Progress, Praise, Perfect and Paul. He has contributed numerous sermons to Sermon Central and other websites including youtube on topics such as understanding success, overcoming anger, deliverance, the authority of believers, and others. He is the convener of Singles Ready To Marry group on Facebook and Whatsapp.
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